Embracing Surrender Honest Confessions

Cutting off Dead Branches: John 15:1-8

During my quiet reflection with God today, it was brought to my attention that I may need to cut off some dead branches.

My confession is that I have been devoting very little time to the ministry of Holistic Ambassadors. I fear I have lost sight of the passion God had placed in my life to live ambitiously for Him. Today God brought to mind the passage of John 15 about the vine and the branches. Here are some of my reflections.

My background

From a very young age I was driven to serve others and help facilitate healing in their lives. I pursued a career in clinical psychology to achieve this very purpose. My life was driven by a single-minded purpose: become someone who could make a difference in the lives of others.

During my training, I was shocked to discover I don’t need to become anything other than myself to fulfill God’s calling. I have since struggled to redefine what I want for my life and how to live out my God-driven desires.

Next Steps

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that does not bear fruit…..”

Matthew 15:1-2a

It doesn’t make sense to earn a doctorate in psychology and then decide to do something different. Those four years of academic training without a doubt shaped my life for the better and I am grateful for them. What concerns me is that most days instead of being excited about the direction my life is going, I feel stifled, trapped and uninspired. This branch is no longer bearing good fruit.

How can a tree bear good fruit when the dead branches continue to poison the tree?

On Cutting Dead Branches

One solution would be to cut my losses and devote all my time and energy to growing and expending Holistic Ambassadors. This option scares me for many reasons. The other option is to wait it out and hope I can somehow balance family life, work life, and hobbies all at once.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

Matthew 15:5

What scares me most of all is that unavoidably work life and family life take up the majority of my time. The consequence is that reflective time alone with God and Holistic Ambassadors have become more like hobbies. As a result I have become disconnected from God. Without God life becomes bland, meaningless, and empty. The only thing left to do is return to God, but first I’ll need to cut off some dead branches. I pray that God will give me the strength to follow through.

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